As someone who often gets questions and advice on love, dating and relationships … one of the more frustrating things that I see is how many people fall in love with the wrong person. And it goes both ways, it is not only women fall for the wrong guys. Guys do too. They fall in love with the wrong woman, and they end up making their lives a nightmare. What may be most frustrating is to see how many people believe that they just can not help who they fall in love in.
You can choose who you fall in love in.
While the feeling may seem kind of instantaneous, for the most part, it is much more gradual than that. Meaning, you fail to hit a woman and five minutes later falls in love. It takes time, we must actively seek to spend time with her. And the more time you spend with a woman … the more likely it is that you will fall for her.
So, why is this important to you?
Imagine yourself in a relationship with a woman who cheated on you. And she did it again and again, and you always take her back because you know that you love her and that feeling makes you accept her indiscretions. Sounds like a nightmare, right? Yes, it happens all the time and it always boils down to this idea that you can not help who you fall for.
Here is another scenario that is quite common. You are in a relationship with a woman who does not let you have a life outside of her. Going to football games with friends, hanging out and shooting pool, all these things are taboo because she needs you to always be around her. Again, a bit of a nightmare, right?
It’s very common. And when I ask because the guys let themselves in a situation like this, the answer almost always has to do with the fact that she is the one they fell for and they do not think they can change that feeling.
My advice:
Learn how to qualify the women before you start spending so much time and energy into a relationship with them. It is much easier to cut ties with a woman when you are aware of who she really is, and you have not invested much time in a relationship. And realize that you can choose who you fall for. You can choose which women you approach, what you ask out on a date, and what you choose to get involved.
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